When you are in the dating game, it is hard to understand exactly who you are dating at first. After about three months into the relationship though, you will learn more about who the person is. They will become comfortable around you and they will show who they really are.
Most people will hide who they really are when they first meet people or get into new relationships. We do this because when we are children, our parents and caregivers tell us that we need to act the best that we can and be on our best behavior. But, after a few months, our life personality and traits will start to show and the things that we are used to doing will come out.
Unless you have a strong personality disorder such as being a psychopath or a sociopath, you can be nice and a better version of yourself for longer than three months but eventually your true self will come out.
Before you really decide if you want to be with this person, make sure that you know them, really know them.
Do not get overly attached to yourself without asking these questions:
- Who is their family and how do they treat them?
- When you go to the restaurant, how does he treat the waitress/waiter?
- How does he interact with children?
- How does he treat pets?
- Do you and he share the same kinds of values and ideas?
- What kind of habits does he have that drive you crazy?
- Does he value your time or does he only care about his needs?
- Do you have to tell them when to be nice? If so, you might be dating a narcissist or a sociopath.
Sometimes when we let people in our lives, we forget to pay attention to small things. This will cause you to wish that you had not started the relationship in the first place. Knowing the person for the first few months might make you think that you have met a great person and then later only to find out that they are really awful to deal with.
You should figure out if you and your partner are really compatible before you get too deep into the relationship. You need to make sure that you are with someone that does not make you question your sanity each day or wish that you had never met them in the first place.
Make sure that you have an open mind and that you do not let your emotions get in the way when you are assessing your relationship.
Pick up on small things that they are doing and make sure that you are not just making up excuses for their behavior. Pay attention to the little things such as how they treat you at home versus in public, if they have manners, if they are kind to your neighbors and your family.
You should always make sure that you really know someone before you get too personal with them. Take time to figure out who they really are and what their flaws are.
You will appreciate yourself more if you know what you are getting yourself into and you will learn to pick up on things that you should avoid. By learning to listen to your gut feeling and by paying attention to their traits, you can learn to be the master at your own dating and find good guys to date and not losers.